Three Things To Help Transition to HTM (Transcript from YouTube Video 3/31/2022)
The first habit that you want to break when you're building your healthy, thin mentality and
anticipating joyful, calm weight loss that is permanent
is stop focusing on the immediate results.
And I know I'm going to lose a bunch of
you right now, but I'm telling you the truth.
If you want permanent weight loss, it cannot be fast.
Because when weight loss is fast, your body
gets freaked out and urges you to binge,
urges you to lower your metabolism.
All of these physiological things happen to you.
You become more attracted to food when you
lose weight quickly because of a diet.
You become more emotionally attracted to food.
All the things that you do not want to happen happen when
you want weight loss and you want it to be quick.
And I respect wanting weight loss, and I think that the
smart way to do it is just to recognize right upfront
that your progress is going to be slower than if you
went on keto in terms of weight loss, but keto, et
cetera, every diet will backfire on you and lead you to
a heavier weight with a body composition that in general is
worse than when you started because you lose fat and muscle
and you generally gain back fat.
So all these things I'm saying, please Google them. You don't have to believe me, these are known things, but the diet culture, the diet industry doesn't
promote these because then you wouldn't buy the diet.
Okay, so stop putting your mindset as in this summer, I
need to look, I need to be £30 less by June.
That just kills you.
Because again, you put yourself perhaps on a diet,
you get those £30 off and you're happy for
five minutes and then the struggle begins.
The struggle isn't the diet.
The struggle is after the diet,
the true after which these girls.
Right, you started at a weight you're not happy with.
You get thin where you want to be for a
minute and then you end up heavier than before.
That's the truth. Okay?
And I know I say that all the time, but
you need to hear it from me or someone because
you hear the opposite message all the time. All right?
So get your head out of that quick fix mentality.
And I know, especially if you're
young, we always want things fast.
But I'm telling you, if you develop your healthy,
thin mentality and you learn to eat intuitively for
the rest of your life, this problem is solved.
It's solved once and for all.
And I know many people who are in our private group or
whatever say, oh, they were here with this and they went off
and they went on a diet and then they come back.
Yeah, well, that's fine.
But I mean, that's fine, but just stick with this.
Just do the mental work of understanding
how you got where you are.
And it was through an obsession with dieting an obsession
may feel like too strong a word for you. So maybe it is.
But just if you've died once or twice or three times
or 20 times, I don't even know how many times I
died in the 25 years I was a Dieter.
But just look at that. Okay.
Is this what you want?
Is this working?
Okay, so use that to fuel.
You not needing this fast, but needing it permanent.
Have permanent be your goal.
Okay, so much better.
All right, then.
Another little thing that I'm going to
call it not going through Pinterest.
I love Pinterest for lots of stuff, but I
haven't been on Pinterest for a while, but I'm
starting to post this stuff on Pinterest.
So I was scrolling through it and, oh, my God.
Well, probably because I'm posting stuff about weight
loss, they send me a bunch of weight
loss stuff and don't go there.
Don't go on these websites or these social
media places where you see all these before
and after and how I lost £40.
And you see women, particularly probably guys too, obviously,
they're showing me women and they show the before
and after and it's this catnip, it's enticing.
Oh, well, she did that.
How did she do that?
But remember, you're not seeing the whole story.
You are not seeing the whole story because I guarantee you,
they do not post when they gain the weight back.
They do not.
And those few people who keep weight off for
a long time are still dieting and having extreme
schedules that are not worth the price that you
pay, which is a dysfunctional relationship with food and
eating because you're obsessing over it.
It is not normal how much we talk about food and eating
and how much of our time we spend worrying about it.
That is not normal.
It has been normalized by our
culture, but that is not normal.
And so when you're thinking, oh, I'm going to go
on Pinterest or something and you start seeing those images
go somewhere else, leave that, because that hurts you.
That's in your mind now those images are in your mind.
Well, if I did that, but you've
been there, you've done that already.
And again, those people who put that out
there, who, let's say maintain weight loss for
a long time and they're financially incentivized to
do that, well, that's a whole different game.
Or you see some celebrity who tout some
diet, which amazingly, so many celebrities have done
that and that's backfired so harshly on them.
But I'm just saying, if your life is
that if your life is weight loss and
being a certain size, okay, then be obsessed.
But we're normal people here living a beautiful life.
Don't screw up your life by
having this huge focus on that.
When you are an intuitive eater, you do
not think about it all the time.
You do not.
And it's a beautiful way to live and it's normal.
It's in harmony with your body.
It's in harmony with Mother Nature
and you will love it.
Okay, so I'm saying Pinterest as a global term.
But if you look at magazines, I don't
know if you still look at magazines.
Watch out for those too.
And watch out for Instagram. All those things.
Just be immune to those before and after
pictures and people photos can be doctored.
One of the posts I did, I forget if it was
on this or on TikTok, you can buy before and after
photos and I did that to show how easy it is.
And you can claim that that
person lost weight with your thing.
No one cares.
No one polices that.
So be very wary of it.
And if it's someone you follow and you know that
really is them, you don't know their whole story.
I don't know if you guys remember someone.
I forget her name.
But she was on Instagram. I didn't follow her.
But a friend of mine did she come freely or something.
And she was hyping all this way
that she ate and lived and everything.
I don't even know. I think she was pretty thin.
It probably was.
And then she cracked and she put out
this post saying this is all a lie.
So beware my friends. Beware okay.
So first one is not being in a rush,
knowing this is a lifetime change you're doing.
Second is not going on these websites that make you
feel bad and also make you doubt that make you
believe that a diet is going to work because you
know it doesn't because you've already done that many times.
And then the third thing, and I know
this is a tough one, stop weighing yourself.
Stop weighing yourself.
Not because you don't care about the number and
not because that number doesn't matter because it is
a measure of where you are in a sense.
But when you're building your healthy, fit
mentality, when you weigh yourself, it disconnects
you from hunger and satiety.
Because in the back of your head, when you think
about that number, you think about what that number was
this morning and you think, well, if I do this
and maybe it will be a little bit less tomorrow,
but that's not what you want to connect with.
You do not want to connect
with that number as your guide.
You want your guide to be hunger
and satiety and weighing yourself corrupts that.
And it's not reliable day to day.
I used to weigh myself at least,
really probably twice a day at least.
And if I was around my house and there
the scale was, I might hop on it again.
All it did was make me think about that number instead of
was I hungry or was I not hungry or what did I
crave and was I tired or did I need to exercise?
All these things that number messes with.
Okay, so instead of feeling your body gosh,
I just really need to move today.
You go, well, I weighed more today,
so I really should go do something.
But I'm exhausted.
No, get that scale.
And it's not because you're just going to let
yourself go crazy and just eat whatever you want
because you don't have to weigh yourself.
No, that is not what we're saying.
We're saying when that scale goes away, you have
no other choice, but you have no other choice
than to say to yourself, okay, I'm not going
to be able to weigh myself.
I better key into hunger so I know how I'm doing.
And isn't that brilliant? Yes, it is.
That is how you want to live.
And that scale that you have that we
put in an honored place in our bathroom
or whatever, people didn't use to weigh themselves.
And I know it's not a causal relationship that you can
define, but there's a lot of things that people didn't use
to do that we think, oh, it's necessary now, like weigh
yourself or have an app tell you what to do.
And people used to be a lot thinner,
and I'm old enough to remember that.
And so all the people that are heavier now, a
large majority of them are heavier because diet culture has
trained them to disconnect from hunger and satiety.
And I'm going to tell you a quick story
from yesterday, and I put this on TikTok.
Come over to TikTok. It's fun.
Anyway, so I was going out to dinner, and I
did a quick video saying, I'm going out to dinner
in an hour and a half or whatever.
And I'm hungry now.
And as a dietary, I would have said, okay, just
wait till dinner and just try to eat 500 calories. Okay?
No, I ate. Doesn't matter.
I ate a little food right then when I
was hungry, when I was distracted by food, when
the thought of food made my mouth water, when
my body was just going, Where's the food?
You get to know your body, how that feels.
And then an hour and a half later, we
went out to dinner, and I still had some
hunger because I didn't eat too much.
I didn't want to kill my hunger.
I just wanted to calm it down, which is how
you that's how you learn to work your hunger.
Like, I still wanted to be hungry at dinner.
I just didn't want to be hungry.
So we got to dinner and we ordered an appetizer.
It happened to be enormous and fabulous.
So I eat a lot of that, and I felt great.
But I'd already ordered dinner, not
knowing how enormous this appetizer was.
And I brought the whole meal home.
And I know because I was with
people, I didn't really know that.
Well, I know they were like, that is weird. I know.
But you know what?
I don't care.
I refuse to eat without hunger because eating
without hunger is zero pleasure zero for me
as a developed intuitive eater and you will
get here give yourself a chance where eating
without hunger is absolutely something you dismiss easily.
So when the food came, the dinner part came and
it was really looked great and I brought it home.
I'm so excited that it's down in my refrigerator right
now and whenever I want today I can eat that.
Actually, my mouth is fluttering right now thinking
about it because I'm a little bit hungry.
So it's a beautiful thing to understand that the food that
you were served or you make at home is yours.
You can have it all, just not all at once.
Wait for hunger, my friends.
This is a much better way to live.
You can do this, okay? Yes, you can.
Don't let the diet industry and the diet culture convince you
that in order to lose weight you have to diet.
No, in order to lose weight you have to not diet. Okay?
Stick with me again.
Come on TikTok come on Instagram a
private Facebook group, regular Facebook page, Twitter.
We have a podcast.
I take these videos and I make them
into podcasts so listen to us there.
It's on Apple and Spotify.
It's easy to find healthy fit mentality is
the handle a lot or diets or fattening?
There is a weird diets or fattening group that I
don't know what that is but that's not me.
So if you don't see activity in it, that's not it.
Or if you don't get accepted into
it, it's because it doesn't exist.
So anyway, okay, it's great to be here
with you guys and thank you for listening.
Please like share and subscribe subscribe is the big one really
trying to get some more people to understand this message Because
every time I get literally a loving letter from someone an
email which I get honestly daily saying how much this has
changed their life it makes me want to help more so
it's great to be with you.
I'll be back soon. You can do this.
Don't let anyone tell you. You can't. You can't.
This is normal. I'll talk to you soon.