Two reactions: First, of course it was really lame for that guy to assume that her weight was any of his business, or that he was, in any way, qualified to judge whether or not she was a good role model.
Second reaction: Even though I fully support Jennifer in her job at whatever weight she wants to be, I also can’t help thinking that if she could, she would choose to have a thinner body.
I don’t know her. But, I do know many, many people like her. These are people who have tried to get thin, through dieting, and have ended up being fatter than ever as a result. They started at 20 pounds over weight, lost it, then gained back 25. Then they lost that and gained back 30. Etc Etc Etc.
No, I am not sure this is what happened to her, but I would bet that it is.
And what happens to many of these people is that they just give up and decide that they are just going to live their lives at the weight they are.
I actually think this is smarter than continuing to diet and lose and diet and gain. It is more healthful to stay heavy than to yo yo.
But, she may not realize that she does have another choice. She could learn to trust herself and to reject the culturally supported truism that diets are the way to thinness.
She could re-connect with her biology and realize that she does not have to punish herself to get thin. She has to trust herself and respect the instincts she was born with, but that have been trained out of her.
Diets have made her sad, hungry, feel imprisoned, and consistently disappointed because she never kept any weight off.
But, Jennifer, if you want to be thin, try a whole new way of thinking. Try eating what you crave when you are hungry. Instead of eating dry tuna on lettuce and fruit for lunch, order what you love and enjoy it until you are no longer hungry. No, it will not take long! Maybe you will only eat half of it-
But you know what is so great? Think of it this way: You can eat the whole thing. Just not all at once…
What a great saying, right? You can eat the whole cake. Just not all at once. You can eat the whole fried fish platter. Just not all at once. You can eat the whole rueben. Just not all at once You can eat the whole bowl of fruit. Just not all at once. You can eat the whole bowl of broccoli. Just not all at once.
No matter what the food, it is NOT okay to overload your stomach.
(But once you free yourself to eat what you want, you will find that your choices change and eating cake at every meal just isn’t as delightful as you thought it would be..)
So, relax. There is no “denial” in thin mentality living. There is “delaying.” Delay eating until you are truly hungry. Then enjoy. And then, when the hunger is gone, delay eating more until you are hungry again.
If anyone knows Jennifer- send her this post 😉 . I wish her all the best, and hope that someday she discovers that she, too, was born with a thin mentality, but was not taught to respect her own instincts and biology.
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