Archive for: January, 2016

Thin for the Rest of Your Life or Dieter – You Choose


Some of you are really good dieters.   You have lost weight and felt so good.  But, for some reason, you always gain it back.  You think the problem is with you.  But it isn’t.  The problem is diets.

Diets wreak havoc on your brain, on your body and emotions.  Dieting turns eating into a battlefield where the casualty is your relationship with normal eating.

So you are saying, “Yea, yea, but I want to be thin!”

I get it.

But I want you to get thin once and for all.  No more up and down.  No more denial.  No more ignoring your body.

The way to start is to promise yourself that you never diet again.    I know that seems so revolutionary- so crazy.  But think about it.  Isn’t it time to try something else, instead of dieting?
The only reason you actually think diets work is because everyday you see so, so, so many ads promoting diets.

But what if you saw ads everyday that portrayed the real result of diets,  What if the “before” and “after” photos were followed the true after photo–– the one taken 6 months later, or a year later, where the person is heavier than ever!

If that is what you saw, which would represent the TRUTH, then would you still diet?


But I know you need to replace dieting with something else.   Replace it with is a “thin mentality.”  How do you do this?

You model thin behavior.

And thin behavior is built on the simple concept that your body was born with the wisdom to know what to eat and when to eat, and how much to eat.

But that has been trained out of you.

You can get it back.

Wait for hunger.  Look forward to hunger, don’t be scared of it.  You aren’t on a diet anymore, so when you get hungry, you can eat!  And then, respect your body by listening to it. Notice that when your body isn’t hungry anymore, your enjoyment of food goes down-  again, hunger is the best sauce!  So notice when you have had enough.  Could you stop now?

And since you know you will never diet again and can eat whenever you get hungry, it is so much easier to stop.  You know why?   Because if you are hungry again in ten minutes- you can eat!

It is normal to eat when you are hungry and stop when you aren’t.  So simple, yet the diet industry has trained us to believe we need some fancy combination of food groups.  Geez!

Your body is trying to give you the signals you need to eat appropriately for you to be your best weight!  Your body doesn’t “want” to be fat.  Listen to your body.

Just ask yourself:  am I hungry?  If you aren’t sure- you are NOT hungry…

Eating when you are not hungry is a bad habit.  You can break that habit.  And your body will thank you by losing weight.  And since you are respecting your body’s  hunger and satiety cues, there will be no “payback” weight gain.  Your body is beginning to trust that you will eat when hungry.  And it is so thankful.  That is the way it is supposed to be.


Recognizing True Hunger



Yes, there is an adjustment period as you learn to leave your diet mentality behind.  You aren’t used to listening for hunger.

In this preliminary stage, stay calm, slow down a bit and actively listen.  If you decide to eat for reasons other than hunger, at least own that.  Then, see if eating that actually made anything better.  And then, next time, try delaying for 10 minutes.  See how you feel.  Delay for 20 minutes.  See how you feel.

And what you will realize is that if you can just delay long enough, you will have the far more rewarding experience of actually eating when you are hungry.  There is no better or more enjoyable time to eat.

Remember, you will be hungry several times every day.  That means that another eating experience is right around the corner.   This isn’t denial.  This is delaying until your hunger and your eating match up, as Mother Nature intended.

Dieting has made you think eating with a regimented plan is the way to be good.  NO, that is the way to ignore your own body’s voice.  If you don’t listen to it, who will?  You are it!

Dieting  taught you to eat when you weren’t hungry and to eat foods you don’t love.  And it taught you to not eat when you ARE hungry.  No wonder you don’t know when or how much or what to eat!

Don’t feel guilty about that.  You were trying to do the right thing.  Just take it easy, and start the enjoyable journey back to how you were born.  Eating when you were hungry, spitting it out at your parents when you weren’t, and crying if no one fed you.  Simple. Smart. Harmonious. Responsive.


Going to Bed Early to Avoid Eating?? UGH

Woman with insomnia

When I was a dieter, I remember going to bed at 8 to avoid night-time eating?  What a sad way to live, don’t you think?

For me, that was a long time ago, and it makes me sad to think about it because it was so unnecessary.

If you are living with these kinds of  thoughts, then the first step is to realize that this is NOT an okay way to live.  Dieting has made you think that following your diet at all costs, is your number one goal.  No!

Your number one goal should be to reconnect eating with hunger one day, one “eating occasion” at a time.  The supreme joy and normalcy of this is your first reward.  The second is that your body will return to your ideal weight range.  Yes, by eating just what you require to quiet hunger, your body will begin to trust that you are listening to it.  No more urges to binge.  No more need to go to bed early to avoid the fridge… UGH!

This process of returning to the way Mother Nature intended us to eat is just that- a process.  It takes time and it takes finally understanding that dieting is the way to be a dieter, not the way to be your best, your ideal weight.

Please read these blogs to understand how wise this is.  I have a workbook to guide you through it too.  If you can’t afford it, email me.  I am committed to helping you, my friend, find the joy and freedom that I did.  Life is so so much better with food and eating in its proper place.



Dieters Battle, Thin Mentality People Live in Peace

constant battle

Don’t let the New Year bully you into a diet.  Instead, develop your thin mentality.

And the first step is to to learn what it feels like to be hungry, and to NOT be hungry.  To start feeling the difference, experiment a bit:

  • Take a bite of something when you are not hungry.  Notice how it feels.  There is no big spark of taste bud happiness, is there?  It may still be “good,” but there are no fireworks, are there?
  • Remember that feeling.
  • Then take a bite of something when you know for certain that you ARE hungry.
  • How does that compare?

This seems so simplistic, but over years, or decades, if you have ignored these sensations, you have to coax them back, so that you can use them to guide you once again.  (As Mother Nature intended, of course.)

At this point, if I eat when I am not hungry, or hungry enough, I know it immediately because the food almost feels foreign in my mouth.  LIke my body is saying, “Hey, what the heck is this?”

Honestly, I remember a time when I would have said that life would be so great if I could just eat what I wanted.  I imagined myself eating tons of food and being slim.

Okay, well here is the thing:   With a thin mentality, you do eat whatever you want.  But the catch is, that you don’t end up eating as much as you thought you would because you have tuned into what it feels like to be satiated.

That is the whole crux of it.

I know you may not believe me.  You just can’t imagine that you could eat without a huge list of good foods versus bad foods at your side.  You have been so trained by the diet industry, and society in general, that you need a lot of “help” to decide what to eat.  But, please believe that you DO NOT.

When you reconnect eating with hunger, and when you reconnect eating with your body’s cravings, all the mystery is gone.  It truly is simple and beautiful.

I would not have thought this was true either.  But, free yourself from the good food, bad food dieting tyranny that has crippled your ability to eat normally.  You can get normal eating back.  And when you eat normally, for your specific body, and body type, your weight returns to normal for you.

If you want to be super skinny, you are gong to have to eat abnormally.

But if you want to be normal/thin, rebuild your normal relationship with food.


Up and Down Dieting, Not What You Want…


Jenny Craig has hired Kirstie Alley again…  Oprah has bought a share of Weight Watchers and is now their spokesperson.

Do you realize what the message is?


Weight Watchers and Jenny Craig want their brand represented

by women who are famous for their up and down weight loss and gain.  


Did you get that?

How can we be surprised, angry or feel bamboozled by an industry that is so very clear in its message?

Go on our diet, and just like these famous celebs, you will go up and down the scale for decades.

Are we that star-struck that we don’t even notice that their weight loss only lasts as long as the photoshoot?  Google Valerie Bertinelli, Jessica Simpson, Carnie Wilson etc., etc., and you will see the whole picture.  And men are in this mix as well.  Terry Bradshaw is looking heavy again, at least in the last pic I saw.

I am NOT shaming these people.  I have so much empathy for these celebrities whose livelihood depends on their appearance.  I am trying to help YOU see the reality here, and not be swayed by a picture that is a “snap shot” of their lives, and not the whole story.

Connect the dots:  diets do not work.

Then, connect hunger with eating.  Build your healthy Thin Mentality.

(New Workbook available Jan 26, 2016 on this website- First 12 Weeks of your Healthy Thin Mentality)


More Evidence Stressed Out Dieters Lose Health, Not Weight

tiny_bunny_eating_carrot1So interesting…

I was listening to satellite radio yesterday- Oprah channel.  This could have been an old interview- really don’t know, but it featured Deepak Chopra.

He was talking about how powerful the mind is.

He referenced a study on cholesterol.  High cholesterol food was given to several groups of  bunnies.  One of the groups did not suffer any negative effect from the high cholesterol diet.

Do you know what they figured out?

The researcher who was feeding that group of rabbits was interacting with them affectionately as they were fed.

Chopra explained that the researcher inadvertently demonstrated how providing a calm, positive and relaxed eating situation for the bunnies was extraordinarily advantageous to their health.  Their bodies were able to neutralize a food that should impact them badly.  Their calm, positive and relaxed eating was a powerful contributor to their health.

How does this relate to my anti-diet advocacy?

Dieters do not have a calm, relaxed relationship with food!  They are freaked out about what to eat, when to eat, how much.   And, they struggle with stress when they are losing weight, and, of course, when they are gaining it back.

I advocate that you enjoy your food, and that you release yourself from all the traumas of dieting, thinking about dieting, putting yourself on “famines,” and feeling guilty about eating, and fearing food.

In short, I am trying to get you to create your own version of the calm, relaxed rabbit in the study.

And, I guess this study shows that there are even more good effects from this kind of eating than even I thought possible.

The importance of having a relaxed, healthy relationship with food is huge.  Diets ruin that for us.  As a dieter, you may be eating 100% of all the RDA of vitamins and five servings of vegetables a day and lean protein etc.

But the person who is relaxed around all kinds of food and is listening to their body for hunger and satiety cues is creating a healthier, leaner body than the  obsessed, yo yo dieter.


Scientific Studies on Nutrition are often Contradictory…

mit-scientists-jump-rNow scientists are reporting that a low calorie lifestyle is NOT related to longevity?

Remember a few years ago when it was widely reported that there was a causal link between a low calorie diet and living longer??

My point is this:

The scientific community has come up with very few recommendations on nutrition that have not been subsequently changed.

So how does this effect us, the thin mentality people?

If you live with a thin mentality, you don’t pay attention to that stuff anyway.  You are in touch with your own wisdom- your body’s instincts.  That is what drives your food choices, not the “nutrition wisdom of the week.”

But here is something I have noticed about myself, and I would love to know if anyone else has noticed this.

Nutritionists traditionally recommend eating every meal with adherence to the food pyramid or some food rules.

Well, I absolutely do not eat that way.  I have noticed that I tend to crave one kind of food at a time.  I will crave meat, and eat a meal that is “meat-heavy.”  Then another meal I will crave pasta and eat a meal that is “pasta-heavy.”  Then I will crave vegetables and eat a meal that is “vegetable-heavy.”

In other words, my nutrition isn’t balanced at every meal, it is balanced over several meals.

And I feel great.

It is important for you to listen and learn about how your body drives you to “nutritious choices.” And may I remind you that if you don’t think your body will talk to you, you are incorrect.  You don’t hear it now because you have shut down your inner voice for a long time.

Get quiet and really focus on listening.  You will not be good at this at first.  But every time that you make the effort to listen to your body, you will get better at it.   And your long-ignored instincts will slowly but surely start making more noise.

I wasn’t good at it at first either.  Now, I am.  I am not special in this way.  I am normal.  And normal has been trained out of you by all the dieting you have done in your life.


We Are All Different, Only A Thin Mentality Respects That

quote-we-don-t-need-sugar-to-live-and-we-don-t-need-it-as-a-society-mehmet-oz-140657I watch Dr. Oz to get fired up about how ridiculous food rules are.  He is always trying to get rid of some food that I enjoy.  Like sugar or bread…

He was interviewing a doctor who wrote a book saying that American wheat is poison.  (This is a topic for another day.)

To prove his point, he had 5 women eat some whole wheat bread one day and the next day they ate a candy bar.  They measured spikes in blood sugar after each.

So interesting…   Dr. Oz, is ALWAYS saying how simple carbs (like in candy bars) spike your blood sugar.  I would have thought he  would have based this on some kind of evidence.

Instead, he said that he didn’t think anyone had ever done this simple experiment before.  WHAT??  He constantly pushes whole grains to keep your blood sugar steadier, yet he never had any scientific proof of that???  Maddening!

The results showed that in 2 or 3  (sorry can’t remember) of these women, the whole grain bread spiked their blood sugar more than the candy bar!

I was not surprised.  Do you know why?  Because that is how it is for me.  I can feel it.  (Because I am paying attention to my body.)

What conclusions can we draw from this?

That food rules are irrelevant because they assume that there are minimal differences in:

1.  What kind of food individuals might require
2.  How much food individuals require
3.  How individuals metabolize that food.

Da da da…. we are different!

There is even a lot of variability within a person.   Some days you need more protein, some days more carbs, some days it is fat.  Whatever!

So why do we go on diets or pay attention to “experts” like Dr. Oz who advocate magic formulas that don’t respect these differences?

Some people need more food than others.  Some need more protein.  Some need more fat.  It is just the way it is.  You all know someone who can eat more and not gain.  Well, some people are tall and some are short.  What are you going to do about it?

You aren’t going to do anything about it.  You are going to say to yourself, “I have this body.  It requires a certain amount of food.  Maybe less than my friend, maybe more than my sister.  Whatever.  I am going to listen to my unique body to know what to eat and when.  And I am not going to pout because my friend gets to eat 200 calories a day more than me.  I have prettier feet.  So what…”  🙂

People!!! It is the money!!

If they don’t come up with “new” ideas, they don’t have a TV show.

And we are like sheep, following and paying.  Ugh Ugh Ugh

There is one truth that you can rely on.  Whatever created us took into account that we needed to have signals to know what to eat and when.  Otherwise, we would eat rubber and food  that had spoiled, or never eat, or eat too much.  We were given “senses” to guide us.

And we have thrown them in the trash and tuned into the “handsome” doctor instead!

And his pockets, and the network, and the pine nut, ginseng companies are all enjoying our money.  Meanwhile, we are NOT enjoying our lives as much as we could be because we are obsessed with our weight and eating.

And that obsession, instead of making you thin, is making you fatter.

You know it.  Your efforts bring you nothing but short term success or up and down weight control at best.

Eat in harmony with your body.  It is delightful.


Work With Your Hunger, Not Against It…

Couple Walking and Eating Ice Cream

Remember, you are building a thin mentality to replace your diet mentality.

That means we are adopting the behavior of naturally thin people. And what do naturally thin people do that most impacts their weight?  They eat less, overall.  But no worries as I say that!  Don’t make that sad assumption that you will be in denial!  That is your diet brain talking.

When I say “they eat less” you are picturing yourself lying in bed after eating a small dinner and saying to yourself, “Just go to sleep and the day will be over and I will have made it through the day on my diet.”

What an awful, awful way to live


That is not what you will do as you build your thin mentality.

You are going to learn that if you eat when you are hungry, just enough to satisfy that hunger, you will be eating less than you used to. (When you weren’t dieting.)  But it isn’t painful.  Eating less is painful when foods are forbidden and hunger is denied.

If you are hungry and want a cheese danish, you will eat a few bites, and see how you feel.  You may indeed need the whole thing.  But give yourself a chance to be very satisfied and happy eating half.  But if you are hungry for the whole thing, that is OK!!  Just be open to the possibility that 1/2 is enough.  That is what naturally thin people do.  They do not feel an obligation to eat the whole thing!

And be open to other cravings too.  Your body will, yes it will, crave “healthy foods.”  Be willing to accept those cravings as well as the cravings for what you used to consider “bad” food.  Just because I am saying that you can eat whatever you crave, don’t try to talk yourself into a cookie when what you really crave is a crisp salad.

Your thin mentality will allow you to eat less, but enjoy it more.  Way more.  And you will feel powerful, in control, and relaxed around food.

And that is how weight comes off.  And, the thinner you get, the less food you will require.  But that will feel fine to you because it is in complete harmony with your body.  Of course smaller people require less food.

If your goal is to eat as much food as possible, you are stuck in a diet mentality.  A happier goal is to eat when you are hungry.  This is normal, healthful and enjoyable.


Go Ahead and Google It

Screen Shot 2013-11-22 at 4.16.58 PM

Go ahead and google- “do diets work” or “diets don’t work” and you will find studies like this:

In case you don’t have time to read it, I pulled out some quotes from the study that you might find alarming:

  • “We concluded most of them would have been better off not going on the diet at all.”
  • “Diets do not lead to sustained weight loss or health benefits for the majority of people.”
  • “Several studies indicate that dieting is actually a consistent predictor of future weight gain,
  • “One of the best predictors of weight gain over the four years was having lost weight on a diet at some point during the years before the study started,”
  • “83 percent gained back more weight than they had lost.”
  • “We asked what evidence is there that dieting works in the long term, and found that the evidence shows the opposite”

This kind of information isn’t “pushed” to you like diet ads.  But if you look for it, it is out there.

So ironic, alongside these articles are tons of “diet ads.” Ugh!  Be too smart for this.