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Archive for: September, 2013
Sep
24

They shake their heads? You smile…

eating argue

As you set out to reestablish a healthy relationship with food and eating, and get thin once and for all, do not underestimate the objections you will run into.  Well meaning people think that dieting and restrictions are the only way.  They will shake their heads when you select a cookie from the buffet.

I respect these people because I know that their motives are good.  But having good motives can’t change that dieting causes misery, weight gain, and food obsessions.

Once you get your weight to a good place, it is easier to handle these looks because you can say, “Hey, look at me, I am fine.”

But if you are heavy, it is harder to eat in response to hunger with confidence in front of others.  Your spouse, your mother, your friends may, in an effort to help you, tell you that it cannot possibly be good to eat a cookie.

That is why I built this site, blog, and post on Facebook.  You need an ally in this.  Check in often to stay strong.  Get energy and confidence from other peoples’ comments and posts.  And for those of you who are having good experiences building your thin mentality, please share because words from you mean more than words from me.

It is good to have a few key phrases you say to yourself to handle comments, or looks or pro-diet propaganda-  (I honestly don’t think propaganda is too strong a word!)

Here are a couple of phrases:

I can eat it all, just not all at once.
If diets worked we would all be thin- (including the people who are shaking their heads!)
My body is smarter than any diet expert.
Delay eating, don’t deny.
Eating a cookie when I am hungry for something sweet is reasonable
Eating three bowls green beans when I am hungry for something sweet is not.

It takes perseverance, strength, and faith in yourself that you can be one of the people who can look at the diet culture we live in, and reject it in favor of a calm, reasonable, biology driven eating.

But this is still easier than dieting for the rest of your life.  And more fun. And permanent. And smarter.

Sep
7

Kevin James- So funny, so sad

kevin-james-at-event-of-zookeeperI saw Kevin James (comedian from King of Queens TV show) on TV last night.  He was doing a celebrity mini tennis match at the US Open in NYC on ESPN 2.

He is huge, again.

I remember seeing him on his show after he lost weight.  They based a whole episode on it.  I had a sinking feeling as I watched.  I knew that as happy as he was, even when he was really just “acting” in the show, that he was doomed.

He lost it really quickly on a low carb diet.

He gained it back, of course.  And as fabulous as he felt when he trimmed down, you know he feels like a loser gaining it all back- and more.

It is so hard  You wear your weight gain like a sign that says, “Hey, look at me, I lost weight but am such a pig I gained it all back and even more!”

You feel weak, embarrassed and angry at yourself.  You recount all the suffering it took to get thin, and then you marvel at how fast you gained it back.

UGH.

Please folks, realize that you are NOT weak.  It is human nature, fantastic strong human nature, to hoard food after deprivation.  Once, when we all lived in caves, it kept you ALIVE.

Don’t be mad at your body.  It is trying to keep YOU alive.

Be mad at yourself for falling prey to the diet industry.  And, of course, be mad at the diet industry.

What else, with such an incredibly high failure rate would thrive?   (If you judge diet success by long term weight loss, the numbers are tiny- and those very few people who do keep it off diet rigidly for the rest of their lives.  NO thank you!)

You are in a wedding in three months.  You are going to lose three dress sizes.  And bingo you will be thin for that day.  And then, I promise you, you will gain it back.  It is only a matter of time.

And isn’t it actually worse to get thin for the day and then get fat again?

(I am NOT saying to stay fat!!!!)

Oh really,,,, you think you will keep it off this time?   OK- keep bashing your head against the wall.  Sorry, to mean to be harsh, but honestly, I want to help you realize that you are headed down a miserable path if you decide to diet again.

You are fat because you are seeking to solve your weight issue with a bandaid instead of cutting off the “bleeding” at the source.

You have put your body on a roller coaster of  restriction and then bingeing.  And, until you get off that roller coaster, until you stop the bleeding at the source, you will continue to diet, lose, and gain.

Earn your body’s trust again.

How?

Eat when you are hungry.  Oh boy, I say that a lot.  It is so simple, yet so perfect.

And building your body’s trust (that you won’t starve it) involves not only eating when you are hungry, it is NOT eating when your are NOT hungry.

I could help Kevin.  It would take time, but his body can recover from what he has done to it.  He may not be destined to have wash board abs.  But, he is a great athlete stuck in a fat body that, I am sure, makes him sad…

And you aren’t meant to be overweight either.  You were born to enjoy food that you love when you are hungry.  Does that sound like a fantasy world?

Well, the nutrition/diet industry spends a lot of money every year making you think that your “fantasy” of a thin body can be achieved through their gimmicks.

Develop your thin mentality, and buck your diet mentality.

Diet rules make you eat what you don’t want when you aren’t hungry and avoid what you do want when you are hungry.

Do you see how backwards that is?

We are meant to eat all kinds of delicious foods, including steak, candy, and greens.  Yes you will want greens too.  Yes, you will crave water instead of coke.  Yes you will eat less some days and more on others.

You will be happier and love your life more when have a strong thin mentality instead of a diet mentality.

You will go to parties and eat wonderful foods without feeling worried or bingeing.  You will skip breakfast if you aren’t hungry.  You will eat lunch at 10:30 if you feel like it.  You will eat dessert first if that is what you want.  You will eat a plate of steak and nothing else if that is what you hunger for.  You will eat potato chips and cookies.  I do!!  But not unless I am hungry FOR THEM!

As long as you listen to your body, and eat when only in response to being hungry, you will be FINE.

And YES, you will get to your ideal body weight.  It is just a matter of time, and trust.

Remember, the choice you think is there is NOT there:  You will NOT go on a diet, and keep it off.  If that was possible, you would have already done it and not be reading this right now.