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Archive for: December, 2012
Dec
3

Radio Show – Why I didn’t fit in

boo me in purseSomeone asked me to be on the radio.  They clearly didn’t look at my website or Facebook page very well.

I didn’t fit in well at all…  (Yes that is me with my dog-just love this pic so thought I’d share…)

They built a show, one that they hope will bring in advertising revenue, based on “healthy lifestyles.”

It was the typical, tired, overused cliches and rules about dieting and how to get thin.  A phrase that was used a lot was, “How to make it through the holidays without gaining weight.”

Is that really the best we can do?  To “make it through” the holidays?

A caller called in and said that he eats an apple before going to a party so that he eats less at the party.  Everyone cheered- what a  “good” way to make it through the holidays- ??

That is such a diet mentality.

Here is a thin mentality dealing with the holidays:

I love the holidays- there is so much good food that I don’t usually get that I can enjoy.  I get that smoked turkey from my aunt, there is eggnog and roast beef and special roasted vegetables at my sister’s house and I cook more than usual, including that strata for Christmas morning.

It is a wonderful time of the year to enjoy satisfying my hunger.

Before a special meal,  I make sure that I am in Stage 2 hunger when it will be time to eat.  (Not desperately hungry like when I am at Stage 3, just pleasantly hungry.)
I have learned over the years how to time this very well. You will too!

If I know I won’t make it to dinner without getting over hungry, I eat a little something I love from the appetizer table.  (not an apple at home by myself!!)  But, since I like the actual meal better than the appetizers, I would never fill up and waste my hunger on that.  (There are sometimes when I prefer appetizers, but not over the holidays!)

Anyway do you get the idea?

It is a mindset that isn’t afraid of the holiday food!  I appreciate holiday food.  But, since I can always eat what I crave when I am hungry, there is ZERO  motivation to over eat.

The longer you are a thin mentality person, the less tolerance you have for over eating.  It is a terrible feeling to overload your stomach.  It ruins the evening- or day.  I haven’t done it in a long long time, but I remember the feeling well.

It was always especially bad after dieting.  After weeks or months of strict eating, I would just lose it and binge.  I know you know the feeing.  To be free of that is such a triumph.  I never ever ever worry about that anymore.

I am not special.  This is normal.

I hope you had a good holiday season.  I hope you enjoyed great food when you were hungry.  I hope you stopped when your fantastic body said, “enough.”

It takes some trial and error for a thin mentality to take hold.  Be willing to get through it.  The reward:  thin, happy, relaxed around food.  (For the rest of your life.)

Happy 2013 🙂

Dec
3

Response to Facebook Comment

hungry-apology

It is great when people make comments because it helps me to know what would be a helpful blog.

OK- so let’s talk about the “stages” of hunger.  This is my own interpretation of hunger and what it means to me.  This is just common sense.

Stage 1 hunger is when you notice that you are starting to get hungry.  It is NOT an emergency.  I view it like this.  “Great, I am getting hungry, I will get to eat soon.”   I say it to myself that way because it is fun to eat when you are hungry.  It is a great, wonderful experience.  It is not full of angst and guilt and counting, like when I was a dieter.

If I was really active the day before, I might start to feel hungry earlier than usual, and it may come on really strong and fast.  Since I have made the effort to learn about my hunger, I know this.  So I don’t worry and think, “Oh no, I am so hungry and all I can have is tuna.”  NO!  I simply say, “Wow, this feels like that kind of hunger that gets strong really quickly, so I better figure out what/ when/where I am going to eat.”

This again is just common sense and me knowing how to take care of my hunger.

Stage 2 hunger is when I eat.  I am hungry, easily distracted by the thought of food, my mouth waters at the mention of food.  So I eat!

If, for whatever reason, I have had to wait until Stage 3 hunger–which is when you feel desperately hungry and even grumpy and really “empty,” I have noticed that I eat more and enjoy it less. I am not as picky about what I eat, and I eat quickly.

Sure this happens sometimes, of course.  The real world will do that to you.

But I don’t stress out about that.  I just say to myself, tomorrow, I should do a better job of making sure that I eat when I am happily in Stage 2 hunger.  I eat less in Stage 2, and enjoy it more.

The biggest thing to avoid is when you are so hungry that hunger goes away.  I have noticed that in the past when I dieted, hunger would go away.  Guess why?  My smart body is coping with the miserable situation I have put it in.  My body thinks I am in a famine and is trying to protect me, so I can survive without that debilitating hunger.  That is how people who are on a diet are able to say, “I am not hungry at all!”

I avoid that like the plague.

Why?

Because I have learned from my own history, and the history of those whom I worked with at Nutrisystem, and other people in my life whom I have watched diet, that if hunger goes away while you are dieting, you are in for binges as soon as you stop dietng.

Your hunger comes ROARING back as soon as you crack and eat a little.

And that is where people gain back all their weight.  It is as if they have no control.  They don’t.  Their bodies are  strong, and worried that another famine is around the corner.  So…. your body seeks to pack on the pounds.

So, bottom line:

Notice your hunger in Stage 1
Eat in Stage 2
Avoid getting to Stage 3

Your body will feel safe, and trust that you will feed it.  You will not feel the urge to hoard food, also known as bingeing.  And you will enjoy a life that includes delicious, non-stressed eating.

Nov
20

Holidays Don’t Need To Make You Gain Weight!

over eat

I know that Thanksgiving scares you.   Please insert other holiday for my international friends :).

You are afraid you will stuff yourself…

Perhaps you think this because you use previous holiday eating as an example of how “bad” you are when you give yourself the “green light” to eat what you want.

But even though you said to yourself-  “Eat what you want—which sounds like a thin mentality—it was NOT a thin mentality because your dialogue sounded like this:

“I am so tired of dieting and here comes Thanksgiving, and my family is all going to be here and I am going to enjoy myself and just eat whatever I want. 

Then, the Monday after Thanksgiving, I will be “really, really good” and diet really,really hard so that I lose weight for Christmas parties. 

And then, I will eat what I want at Christmas and then, starting January 1, I will be really, really, really good and go on a strict diet and get healthy and exercise more…

bla bla bla bla BLEH!

This kind of dialogue is the opposite of a thin mentality—it is a DIET mentality and it is destructive.

When you “binge” eat during the holidays and rationalize it by promising that you are going to go on a diet later, you are training yourself to disconnect from normal hunger and satiety cues.

You alternate hoarding food with starving yourself.  Does that sound smart?

Build your thin mentality and you will never fear holiday eating again.

With a thin mentality, everyday is Thanksgiving.  Everyday there is delicious food.   Everyday you have wonderful choices.  Everyday you enjoy eating what you love.

So don’t use past holiday eating as a way to tell yourself that you can’t be trusted eating the food you crave.  That is not representative of how a true commitment to a thin mentality would work for you.

I promise that you will find more joy and pleasure from eating one delicious plate of Thanksgiving food, than you used to when you succumbed to a binge, and ate four helpings. You felt bad, even as you were eating!  Don’t do that to yourself!!

Stick with this blog over the holidays to keep connected with building your thin mentality.

Oct
30

Halloween, no problem

candy

Don’t let Halloween scare you!

There is ZERO motivation to binge on candy with your thin mentality intact.

I used to be so “good” and not have one bite.  My willpower so “strong.”  Until I broke and shoved down ten at once.

Did I enjoy that?  No.  Even while I was eating them I was bummed out thinking about how I was going to have to starve myself the next day… or not.

Now, the big bowl of candy is no big deal.  It is just a bunch of candy.  When I get hungry, if I want some, I give myself full “permission” to have it.  It holds no magic, no power.  Nothing.

And it is so so interesting.  When I want something sweet now, it is very unlikely that I would pick that, because… I am picky now.

I wouldn’t waste my hunger on a candy bar unless it was the exact kind I love the most and I knew it was fresh.

I love it when I get hungry, I protect my hunger.  I don’t waste it on stuff I don’t love.

Why would I?  Why would you?

That bowl of candy that has been sitting there for a week doesn’t pass the test, usually.  I would rather have something hot and delicious out of the oven-  fresh cookies or whatever.

It may be different for you.  You may not even have a sweet tooth like me.

Value your hunger.   It is a gift from Mother Nature.  And take care of it with food you love, not some random candy bar just because it happens to be there…

Oct
29

Dr. Oz Is At It Again

ozfatbusters

Today’s show is on (another)  latest and greatest fat buster.  Really, again?

He says he doesn’t sell this product so his endorsement of it is “honest.”

Well what does he sell?

He sells his show.  And his show has to have “revolutionary” new foods and magic fat busters to keep you interested.   So he hypes these products to keep you tuned in.  He sells and sells and sells.

Everyday is an amazing breakthrough.   You “can’t miss” this show.  Today he hyped “November as the Month to Remember” with shows all month on this new craving killer, and this new belly buster, and this healthy this, and this healthy that.

We waste so much of our lives, money, and energy on this.  There is NO magic bullet.

Yet Dr. Oz makes you think that there is.  You just need to follow his advice on what and when to eat and you will be saved.

People!  If we took every product that he says you should take everyday (today it is a shot glass of pine nuts)  we would be eating all day long!

I am watching this show as I write this.  A heavy woman is looking at him with adoring eyes. “Surely the lean doctor can save me from my fatness.”

NO. NO. NO.

Wake up and see him for what he is.  He is a celebrity who is making money off the optimism of dieters who believe that if they just find the magic food combination, they will shrink.

Listen to me!!

HE IS MAKING MONEY OFF OF YOU.  IT IS NOT POSSIBLE THAT HE CAN FILL HIS TV SHOW WITH AMAZING BREAK THROUGHS EVERYDAY.  YET HE DOES!

Doesn’t that make you wonder?

Everything on his show is “revolutionary!”

Now he is going to talk about some magic tea in this next segment.  Ugh.

Oh my, and now he says he is going to tell you how to lose three pounds in three days.  Unless you are enormous, that is not possible!  That weight will be mostly water and you will gain that back anyway.

I have to turn it off.

This kind of propaganda is what made you think you need to look elsewhere to know what and when and how much to eat.  But look at his audience full of followers.  They are mostly heavy, right?  So his leadership is not working.

Turn off his show.  Don’t be influenced by his props and rapid fire medical talk.

There is no magic combo.

Your good ole body is right there, with you, hoping against hope that you will listen to it, instead of all the advertisements you see on TV.  And Dr. Oz is one long advertisement for himself.

Oct
28

More on Katie Couric and her Eating Disorder

11th Annual Tribeca Film Festival - Vanity Fair Party - ArrivalsInteresting.

On her new show, Katie talked about having bulimia when she was in college. The pressure to be thin made her adopt a diet mentality that created such a good food – bad food mentality that if she ate one thing- even a stick of regular gum, she freaked out!
That is such a sad story!  Can you imagine all the time and energy she lost doing that?
Even if you don’t have a disorder like that, if you are overly obsessed with food and eating, you are suffering too.
Mother nature didn’t create us to struggle so much with simply eating!  We have turned a wonderful pleasure- eating- into an exercise in complete frustration!
We have been told that eating is complicated and that you must balance all the calories and protein and fat and vitamins!!
Folks, stop it!
There is no such thing as perfect eating.  Your body will guide you to what you need.  Your body is smart.
Here is an example of a smart body.   I got food poisoning the other day- OMG was that awful.  Did my brain know that what I ate was rotten?
No, my smart body did.  It said –  no way am I keeping this rotten food in here and I exploded-!
Ha Ha- you know – threw up many many times.
I count on my body to know when I am poisoned- and to make me sick.  I trust my body to tell me when I am hungry and when I am full.  I trust my body to tell me when I need protein, when I need greens and when I need cake.  And  yes, sometimes I need cake.
I know you think that won’t happen for you.  I know you think you will only crave cake.  Or ice cream or whatever.  That is not true.  You have been taught to mistrust your beautiful body.  And maybe your parents ate all the time, never in response to true hunger, so you never learned to listen.
I say bla bla bla to all of that.  Don’t let past defeat ensure future defeat.  It is NEVER too late to learn to listen to your instincts.  They are still within you, and are just waiting for you to respect them.
To help you, I wrote a book too.  Again, please understand that I am not all about selling a book to you.   But I want you to know that it is available.
I wish someone, when I was younger had helped me stop dieting and wasting my life.  I want to help you.
Oct
6

Jennifer Livingston Story

jenniferlivingstoncbs-screenDid you see the story of the newscaster who fought back when a man emailed her saying that she should lose weight because she was a bad role model?

Two reactions:  First, of course it was really lame for that guy to assume that her weight was any of his business, or that he was, in any way, qualified to judge whether or not she was a good role model.

Second reaction:  Even though I fully support Jennifer in her job at whatever weight she wants to be, I also can’t help thinking that if she could, she would choose to have a thinner body.

I don’t know her.  But, I do know many, many people like her.  These are people who have tried to get thin, through dieting, and have ended up being fatter than ever as a result.  They started at 20 pounds over weight, lost it, then gained back 25.  Then they lost that and gained back 30.  Etc Etc Etc.

No, I am not sure this is what happened to her, but I would bet that it is.

And what happens to many of these people is that they just give up and decide that they are just going to live their lives at the weight they are.

I actually think this is smarter than continuing to diet and lose and diet and gain.  It is more healthful to stay heavy than to yo yo.

But, she may not realize that she does have another choice.  She could learn to trust herself and to reject the culturally supported truism that diets are the way to thinness.

She could re-connect with her biology and realize that she does not have to  punish herself to get thin.  She has to trust herself and respect the instincts she was born with, but that have been trained out of her.

Diets have made her sad, hungry, feel imprisoned, and consistently disappointed  because she never kept any weight off.

But, Jennifer, if you want to be thin, try a whole new way of thinking.  Try eating what you crave when you are hungry.  Instead of eating dry tuna on lettuce and fruit for lunch, order what you love and enjoy it until you are no longer hungry.  No, it will not take long!  Maybe you will only eat half of it-

But you know what is so great?  Think of it this way:  You can eat the whole thing.  Just not all at once…

What a great saying, right?  You can eat the whole cake.  Just not all at once.  You can eat the whole fried fish platter.  Just not all at once.  You can eat the whole rueben.  Just not all at once  You can eat the whole bowl of fruit.  Just not all at once.  You can eat the whole bowl of broccoli.  Just not all at once.

No matter what the food, it is NOT okay to overload your stomach.

(But once you free yourself to eat what you want, you will find that your choices change and eating cake at every meal just isn’t as delightful as you thought it would be..)

So, relax.  There is no “denial” in thin mentality living.  There is “delaying.”  Delay eating until you are truly hungry.  Then enjoy.  And then, when the hunger is gone, delay eating more until you are hungry again.

If anyone knows Jennifer- send her this post 😉 .  I wish her all the best, and hope that someday she discovers that she, too, was born with a thin mentality, but was not taught to respect her own instincts and biology.

Sep
15

Email from Californian Ex-dieter Documenting Progress

VegietableThis email is from someone who found this site and decided it was time to stop dieting.

By the way, I would never publish anything emailed to me, even without your name, without permission from you.

I got the OK to share this, and I hope it is helpful for you to read this.  Remember that your journey is your own, and may be substantially different from the following example.

“Good morning Meg,

My book arrived thank you!  I have read a little over half.  This past weekend and yesterday I reminded myself everyday that I’ve given up the diet mentality and food no longer controls me, it was a very liberating weekend.  Yesterday was a true learning day in terms of feeling my real hunger.  I waited to eat in the morning, ate what I wanted.  Was hungry again at 11, so ate, normally I’d wait till 12.  I was hungry again at 3, so ate again, again ate what I wanted, I was craving chicken 🙂  Got home at 5, not hungry.  Slightly hungry at 6, began eating left over veggies from the day before, and this is where I faltered for the day, I over ate the veggies past fullness because they were just veggies right?  Wrong, I than craved something sweet, I had a bowl of frozen yogurt, but not that I was stuffed I may as well eat something else I liked, I ate half a bag of frozen blueberries, again, already stuffed and not hungry.

I got your book on my porch about an hour later, perfect timing!!  Nice to be able to read and reinforce what I am going through.

I realize I might have these moments during this learning process of reconnecting with myself, and I am okay with that.  I didn’t berate myself, or tell myself its no use etc, because I know it was a matter of the lesson learned.”

Sep
6

In Response to Dr. Oz and the HCG Show today

oz

I am reposting this from a website called Dr. Bill of Health.  I cannot endorse the whole website because I haven’t seen it all, but this article is spot on.

Please remember that those who make money off of a product like this should NOT be the ones doing the research.  The female doctor on the show today, promoting HCG was also the one in charge of her “research.”  People!  Beware!

One of the only no-strings-attached independent reviews of the HCG diet on the internet:

Introduction
What’s all this talk about the HCG Diet these days? Does it work?  Is it safe?  I’ll get right down to it and I’m not going to exercise any diplomacy in my choice of words:  I’m calling the HCG diet yet another gimmicky, too-good-to-be-true, quick-fix diet which will probably only leave you lighter in the wallet and less healthy in the long run.   The preponderance of scientific evidence shows that it has no effect on fat loss beyond that which can be accomplished by just reducing calorie intake.

What is HCG?
HCG stands for Human Chorionic Gonadotropin and is produced during pregnancy. Early reports from British physician Dr. Albert T. Simeons in the 1950s suggested that HCG injections could enhance fat loss and spare valuable lean tissue (muscle).  Recent marketing literature for the product claim that sublingual (under the tongue) HCG drops can enhance fat loss.  As of this writing, there are HCG websites operating in the United States, United Kingdom, Australia, New Zealand, and most other industrialized nations with obesity issues.

Human Chorionic Gonadotropin Research
In the early to mid 1970s, more HCG studies surfaced in the peer-reviewed biomedical literature. A 1973 study by Asher and Harper showed positive results but was later slammed for poor methodology, with subsequent studies consistently debunking its use as ineffective for weight loss.

In 1983, a report published in the Canadian Medical Association Journal reviewed all evidence up to that point and concluded that:

“HCG has no known effect on fat mobilization, appetite, or sense of hunger, or body fat distribution. HCG has not been demonstrated to be effective adjunctive therapy for obesity. There is no substantial evidence that it increases weight loss beyond that resulting from caloric restriction, that it causes a more attractive or “normal” distribution of fat, or that it decreases the hunger and discomfort associated with calorie-restricted diets… [adverse effects main include] headache, irritability, restlessness, depression, fatigue, edema, precocious puberty, gynecomastia, pain at injection site.”

A 1995 meta-analysis (a combined statistical analysis) published in the British Journal of Clinical Pharmacology reexamined all the available scientific evidence and came to the conclusion:

“Methodological scores ranged from 16 to 73 points (maximum score 100), suggesting that most studies were of poor methodological quality.   Of the 12 studies scoring 50 or more points, one reported that HCG was a useful adjunct. The studies scoring 50 or more points were all controlled. 5. We conclude that there is no scientific evidence that HCG is effective in the treatment of obesity; it does not bring about weight-loss of fat-redistribution, nor does it reduce hunger or induce a feeling of well-being.”

Aug
9

Don’t be Fooled by Jennifer Hudson Ad

JHudx-large

I just saw Jennifer Hudson’s ad on TV for Weight Watchers.  I have already seen this commercial so many times that I can sing along with it.  The words talk about being free.  So ironic.

Going on a Weight Watchers diet isn’t glamorous, like Jennifer in her beautiful dress, or fun, despite all the smiling faces.  It is the opposite of freedom.  It is food jail.  Weight Watchers highlights the short term success of its celebrity spokespeople so that you will ignore the failure of diets all around you.  Look at your own life.  Don’t be fooled by the people in the frame of your TV.

If diets worked long term, we would all be scrawny.

If you want to lose weight and you don’t care that you will gain it back, go on a diet.
Do you think I am assuming too much?

How many diets have you been on.  Have you ever kept it off.  If you did, you wouldn’t be considering another diet.

Do you believe that Weight Watchers or any diet program is going to put as much effort into your maintaing your weight loss as is does in helping you lose it?  Look at the commercials.  The amount of time they spend mentioning “maintenance” is much smaller than the time spent talking about weight loss.

There isn’t money in maintenance!  Come on guys, get real!

The money is in helping people lose weight, and getting them back a couple of years later when they think it is their weakness that they gained all the weight back and they need professional help to lose this weight AGAIN.

Ugh.

As you are making your transition to a thin mentality you need to constantly remind yourself that you are doing the right thing.  Read parts of my book that resonate for you.  Start a discussion forum and talk to fellow “thin mentality” converts.  Email me with questions or issues you run into.  I am here to help you stay strong in your very smart, very logical, very enlightened decision to regain your thin self by changing your perspective on food and its role in your life.

Hint:  it is a wonderful pleasure that you deserve to enjoy in quantities appropriate for your body.